When working together stops working

By Candace Doyle
Editor

Susan K. Wehrley president Susan K. Wehrley & Associates

Working together is difficult - almost as difficult as living together.

And for those who live and work together, expect both relationships to feel the strain from time to time, said Susan K. Wehrley, president of Susan K. Wehrley & Associates of Brookfield.

The consultant to many family businesses - several construction companies among them - Wehrley said conflicts can be numerous. And because it's family, the work conflicts can be quite emotional.

"With family businesses, you bring in the emotional element," she said. "It makes those differences of opinions more difficult to work out."

For that reason, Wehrley said work roles need to be clearly defined. For example, she said a father might step down as president, turning the helm of the business over to his son. But that father may still show up at the office, and the son doesn't know how to treat him - as a father or a boss.

"The roles aren't defined," she said. "It makes the whole thing very confusing."

Wehrley said that when she works with companies, she teaches family members to step outside of the emotion involved and try to resolve conflicts without baggage from the past.

And the conflicts can be many, she said.

"How do we manage the money?" she said. "That's a big one."

There may be conflicts about how the company should grow - or how fast.

"Maybe dad started it and wanted to keep it small," she said.

That notion might not sit well with the son, who has visions of fast-paced growth.

Or, perhaps siblings are running the business together. Competitive when younger, they'll bring that same spirit to the work place - and run the risk of hurting the business.

Wehrley said her role in helping troubled family businesses is to help the principals sort out those issues.

"Then you take on one thing at a time," she said.

And she said she recommends that younger family members work someplace else before working for dad or mom.

"First of all, it gives them a sense of confidence," she said. "No. 2, they learn strategies and ways of doing things. That really creates a relationship that's much more mutual."

It also gives the newcomer something to offer the business, which will be viewed more favorably by nonfamily employees.

Wehrley said some people are lucky to learn good conflict resolution skills at home. But they are in the minority.

Yet those skills can be learned - through classes or workshops - and can help save a family business that's heading for trouble.

"I really think a big reason businesses fail is they don't have communication and conflict-resolution skills," she said. "With family businesses, these arguments that are never resolved are getting carried out into the business."

Talking, clearing the air when differences arise, can do much to "diffuse the energy," she said.

"A smart leader is aware of that," she said.

Wehrley said those families considering starting a construction business would be wise to begin by talking about those differences.

"For those thinking of starting a family business, not only should they have a business plan, a strategic plan ... but in addition they should talk about their concerns about working together," she said.

"What are we going to do when those differences come up?" Wehrley said family members should ask themselves.

And for those families already in the thick of things?

"I think they need to take a pulse and say, 'How are we doing?'" she said. "If there's a large turnover or it's not as profitable, it could signal that it's time for outside help.

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